roxanegay:

This morning I was browsing the news as I do every morning and read about the following:

• The difficulties women have in academia if they choose to have children.
• Impending abortion legislation in Texas that will leave only 5 abortion clinics open.
• Nigella Lawson, being choked, in public, by her husband while no one did anything. Then, his mealy mouthed bullshit explanations. And then, some British politician making a crass joke on Twitter about where he would like to squeeze Nigella. And I mean, if that dude choked Nigella in PUBLIC, what the fuck is he doing in private? And also, NIGELLA is a goddess. Motherfucker better recognize. 
• Sexual assault in the military.
• More nonsense about women, writing, and children and frankly, all these discussions about women, fertility, and various professional fields really makes it seem like women are breeding livestock. Just putting that out there.
• All the movies are about men’s stories, basically.
• Sexism in publishing and J. Franzen being, well, J. Franzen.
• Issues of gender, seriousness, and journalism in magazines.

These issues are not equal on the scale of importance. There are innumerable issues, global issues for that matter, beyond this narrow selection of news that demand far more of our time and empathy. We all know that, though. We do. The world is terrible. Measuring the terrible is a pointless exercise. That’s not what this is about.

I was reading all these articles on my phone, still in bed, and honestly, I thought, “Why should I even bother getting out of bed?” I felt incredibly hopeless that in ways both great and small, the reach of misogyny is endless.

And I hate feeling this way because I have a good life. I’ve been through a fair amount of shit but I’m alive. I am loved. I paid my rent on time. I recognize my privilege and honestly, this plagues me a lot, like, girl, what are you angry about, really? Good should be good enough, right? But it’s never really about me, when I write about this stuff. Or if it is, I am the insignificant part. I know my place. 

And still, it feels like there’s not only a glass ceiling, but that women are, no matter what they do, trapped in a glass box. We can see what we want. We can see it clearly but we can’t quite hold it.

This isn’t complaining. This is, I think, coming to terms with impotence.This is being reminded, yet again, that feminism, flawed, fucked up feminism, it matters. It is exceedingly necessary, now more so than ever. Feminism is not something we can turn our backs on. We can’t be complacent with “good lives,” particularly when so many women, the world over, can’t even dream of a good life.

I’m under no illusions about utopia. The world is never going to be ideal for everyone, neither for women nor men. I am not interested in an ideal world. Anything I’ve been through has, in its way, made me, well, me and I don’t want to change that. 

It is not illusory, though, to hope the world can get better in the small ways (publishing, movies, whatever) and the big ways (reproductive freedom) and the absolutely necessary ways (global freedom from gender-based violence and oppression). 

Today, I am frustrated.

Could not have put it better myself. And I’ve felt very trapped in the glass box this year, for a whole host of frustrating bullshit reasons. But then I verbally take down some douchebag who wants to pee in a bath tub or I educate someone on some nuance of radical feminist theory or I think about my badass female writer friends and honestly, I think we can take over the world. Tiny cracks start to break apart the glass box. Slow but steady. 

just remembered how brilliant and sad Skins was. just in time for the wrap up season with Cassie, Effy, and that kid who was in love with Effy but didn’t die. Ugh Effy’s mental breakdown was so painful to watch and Grace’s storyline was beautiful and completely sad. As was Mini’s. But really I just want to know what Tony is up to because that really meta episode of him rediscovering his mind in a very Greek mythologized Uni visit was pure brilliance. But then I just didn’t believe he never came back for Effy. 

How can one show be so so amazing but also kind of terribly shitty at times and I’m very emotionally attached to generation three for some reason. 

Superb in all aspects. Model paper. And, of course, pleasure to have in class. Totally worth the first all-nighter of my two years here. 

dreamyfawn:

i wish that instead of really annoying guys coming up to you in the street to hit on you it was really cool girls who were like hey i like your hair do you want to come over and have some wine and hang out and do eachother’s nails really dope and eat foods and talk shit about all the strange men that have hit on us

that would be so nice. like the most queer friendly college campus but everywhere and the sex part is optional. 

(via givemeadaisy)